I realized that I am about halfway through this tedious process of pulling out stories, old memories, and hidden secrets and did not know if I could finish the task. This emotional roller coaster was taking it's toll both emotionally and physically on me. I had such a range of emotions and I was well aware that I was not close to being finished. However, I knew that if I did not, for once in my life, finish what I had started, that the rest of this “baggage” would be carried by me forever. That was not what I wanted, and decided that it is time to unpack and truly, honestly start the healing process. I had to get back to work and get this process done and over with for good.
As I looked down into the remaining items lying in this case, I knew that the hardest and most painful items of my life were still waiting to be unpacked. They were just sitting there in front of me wanting and needing to be released from the weight of all of this “stuff” that has been aging and yellowing year after year. So, slowly, I once again began to rifle through the contents of my life still waiting to be taken out and acknowledged.
I noticed that in the elasticized pocket on the inside of the suitcase was a detailed road map to Gadsden, Alabama. Wow, I have not thought about this day for so many years. This map was going to lead me to my birthplace and I was going to meet my birth father for the first time. It all came about after receiving a surprise phone call one tuesday evening in May of 1999.